************ World's shortest fairy tale (Pat Wagner) ***********
Once upon a time, a guy asked a girl 'Will you marry me?' The girl said, 'NO!' And the guy lived happily ever after and rode motorcycles and went fishing and hunting and played golf a lot and drank beer and scotch and had tons of money in the bank and left the toilet seat up and farted whenever he wanted.
The End
************ Poems (Patty Mason) ***********
A WOMAN'S POEM:
Before I lay me down to sleep,I pray for a man who's not a creep,
One who's handsome, smart and strong. One who loves to listen long.
One who thinks before he speaks. One who'll call, not wait for weeks.
I pray he's rich and self-employed,and when I spend, won't be annoyed.
One who'll pull out my chair and hold my hand. Massage my feet and help me stand.
Oh send a king to make me a queen, a man who loves to cook and clean.
Pray this man will love no other, and relish visits with my mother.
A MAN'S POEM:
I pray for a deaf-mute gymnast nymphomaniac with big tits who
owns a bar at a fish camp, and loves to send me hunting, fishing and drinking.
This doesn't rhyme and I don't give a shit.
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